Is God to blame?

Because of our many failed attempts of trying to save my late father in law who died last July (he was also a third generation free mason), my dear wife somehow tried to 'blame' God as it were, because he didn't yield to our witnessing. I have subsequently learnt that there is a notion among certain believers, that because the non-elect were not "chosen", that somehow it cannot be their fault that they couldn't be saved, for God never chose them in eternity past! They were not "predestinated" Rom. 8.29-30, Ep. 1.5, & 1.11. In other words they never had a 'chance' to believe and repent, that is they were reprobated to damnation. The correct approach to this dilemma is surely to look at it from the vantage point that none deserve to be saved in the first place, for as that old time preacher C.H. Spurgeon said; "are we not all criminals?" Divine wrath is surely the just desert of every child of Adam, for we inherited his fallen and sinful nature: Psalm 51.5; "Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me."
If it were not for God taking out of this world, or age, "a people for His name." Acts 15.14, we might well exclaim with the disciples; "Who then can be saved?" Matt.19.25, Mark 10.26, Luke 18.26. It is by God's sovereign electing grace alone that any man can be saved, for all "were dead in trespasses and sins" Ep. 2.1.

It is only incumbent on believers to witness (as pathetic as our best attempts most surely are!) to friends, relatives, and whoever else. The parable of the sower in Matt.13 teaches that it is not in ourselves to have the power to coerce, or convert a man to believe (as some think!). There is a Power from above, as taught by the incarnate Deity Himself in John 3.8; "The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou heareth the sound thereof, but canst not tell, whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is everyone that is born of the Spirit." The external convicting force as it were, is from above; it is not of man! Ever remember that God's word is a "hammer", Jer. 23.29! As C.H. Spurgeon so rightly said; "If by a man's charm one can become a convert, then another can come along with more charm and unconvert him. But when God the Holy Spirit does the converting, absolutely NONE can undo the conversion!"

I try not to become emotional about these deep things recorded in God's word, but rather only to believe, and write about "what is written".